Feelings from all the place of my psyche draw me in numerous incompatible directions. Such clashes are certainly not the exclusive prerogative of the trans folk. It's the human lot, for the whole lot of humanity. At least in modernity. Was it ever different?
I accept my outer maleness, the influence upon me of male experience, and I accept my AGP sexuality. About the exact ontological status of my inner femininity I do not know, I can only speculate. The pull of it is sexy, and sexuality comes from somewhere deep. The relationship between one's sexual psychology, one's sexual fantasies and one's outer life is another complex element in everyone's lives. Let no one think that if you're cisgendered then all that is sorted.
I am interested in contemplating, in an open, non-judgemental way, the inner-outer and self-other axes (pl. of axis) of autogynephilia, alongside the female-male one. Politically I would like to promote AGP/crossdreaming pride, akin to gay pride. But I do not wish to take on the (online) public role that significant contributions in these fields would require. Hats off to Jack Molay for putting in the commitment that a prominent role in these fields requires.
As for the progress of my personal descent, we are back to the numerous incompatible directions again. I can't even make up my mind about what exactly I should make my mind up about.
It would be great if there was a more overt or tangible presence of AGP sexual pride and affirmation. A liberation from perversion, disorders, gender issues and other uses and abuses of AGP. It is quite interesting to think how such a take will go down with those who wish to reduce it to a symptom!
ReplyDeleteYes, I think such a presence could serve a very important role.
ReplyDeleteWhen I joined Crossdream Life I assumed that that would be the goal. I was surprised how many other contributors had a fundamentally different view of AGP.